Nuke-Fest One-Third Done + Hanging out in a Hammock = A Good Day

Well good evening dear readers. Happy First Day of Summer, Summer Solstice, Longest Day of the Year ...yippee!! It was an absolutely glorious day here - perfect in every way - high 80's (high 20's for my Canadian folks), 40% humidity, light breeze ... glorious ...positively glorious. Hope it was as glorious where you are. Gosh, I love this time of year.

So ... today marked the 11th Nuke-of-the-Noodle. Yippee! That means I have 19 more to go and I am just a little over one-third of the way FINISHED with the equivalent of sticking my head in a microwave every day (weekends off, natch...I still have to take The Big Blue Pill seven days a week though; no breaks there). Yeah! One day at a time .... I am feeling a little more tired every day, especially as the afternoon comes around. I worked through 'til Thursday (I know, I know, I KNOW!!) and I did work from home though. There was just no way I could go into the office - it just requires too much energy to be around people - which is so unlike me, as I derive energy from being around people - but as the treatments progress, I just find myself a little woozier and fuzzier every day. I'm fine when I'm sitting but when I stand up, I find myself dizzy at times, which as hubby reminds me, is because my equilibrium is off - makes sense, right? Plus, I'm starting to forget things and from time to time, my head hurts. Doc told me that if the headaches continue, it could be swelling - let's hope it doesn't keep up. Steroids are ugly, ugly, ugly drugs ... ughghghgh.

I haven't posted until tonight because candidly, I was just toooooo tired every night. My job requires me to write most days - which I love - and I did have a very productive week, but I realize that with the Nuk-o-rama, my brain just put up a defense and shut down. Actually, it was more like my brain saying to my body "Hey ... tell that beotch to REST UP already." So, by the time I headed off to my "OK, we are going to put your mask on now" Fun Fest, I could barely stand, much less think. In fact, last week, I had walked over to the hospital for a couple of the treatments - the hospital is literally a 5-minute walk and I thought it would be nice to get some exercise - but I cannot even muster up the energy to do that anymore. Please don't get me wrong - I don't say that to sound whiny, or "poor me" - that is complete anathema to me and it's just not my style. It's more to let you fine folks know that the effects of the treatment are starting to take effect and so, This Gal is glad to be able to have the time to rest up.

Speaking of resting up, hubby put up our hammock the other day and I treated myself today to some respite in our Uber comfy Adult-Cloth-Cradle-Nestled-Between-Two-Beautiful-Locust-Trees. Words cannot begin to describe how unbelievably beautiful and calming an experience it was to just allow the breeze to gently rock me, oh so gently ... to feel caressed by the warm breezes, to feel kissed by the sun ... and to just be .... it was heavenly. Truly heavenly.  It was an incredible experience to simply lie there and look up at the branches of the trees, the birds alighting there, listening to them sing and chirp ... I watched a hummingbird fly by me ... then a cardinal, who then perched in the branch above my head. I literally held my breath and felt so honored/honoured that he would choose to sit there, so close to me. I saw a chipmunk skip past me, not three feet away and he, too, stopped and simply looked at me and then skipped away. I felt like Dr. Dolittle! It was beyond awesome - that might sound strange, or hokey or just plain silly but I tell you, dear readers, it was again about perspective. Just lying there, being, appreciating the beauty that surrounds us every day. I am so grateful for that ... and will choose to focus on the small, beautiful positive things when I feel down or sad or not so well ..

It was so nice to finally just take the time to appreciate those small beautiful moments in life, because as the gal who drew my blood today and I were discussing, life is not about things. Things don't matter. They really don't. Oh, I have to go and have my blood drawn every two weeks for the next six months, as Dr Mint Green Shirt (chemo dude) wants to check my platelet, white blood count, all that good stuff - to see if my immune system is compromised, and thus, I have to wear another kind of mask. ("A funny thing happened on the way over here, ladies and goims" ... drum roll .... ) ... corny joke, I know, but all that to say, I bonded with E., the Blood Tech - who did an awesome job, by the way. I have always had a morbid fear of needles - and I married a Type 1 Diabetic who shoots up three times a day! - and I tell you, I barely felt that pointy sucker go in. Anyway, E sang to me, talked to me about the Lord's way (I started it by saying that God works in mysterious ways and thus, I don't ask "why me?" That's just futile and counterproductive in my view, but that's just me) ... and so, it was a good day ... a very good day ... hoping all of you fine folks had a good day too ...

Thanks as always for your support and love and for reaching out. Means the world to me - thank you, grazie, merci, gracias, danke! Now that I am off, I will likely be posting more often as I will still need to give my brain a bit of a work out; otherwise, I will be reduced to reading children's literature (which might actually be fun...). Tonight's sign off courtesy of Racherella... :-)

Slide, Slide, Slippity Slide, Fantastic Voyage (in the hammock) :-)

Cancerella, Handsome-Hammock-Hanger-Hubby, and our Two Feline Friends
xoxoxoxoxoxox